I believe him.

Lot of anger directed towards him for saying this, but 1) I believe him because 2) he’s finally telling us the truth and 3) we don’t pay attention to how stress and anxiety affects our physical health and our intimate relationships. I did the opposite–I shut down my emotional life and intimate relationships and ignored the pain–and I ended up having a grand mal seizure. He’s in a dead marriage that probably died when he and Hillary embarked on their dual political ambitions. Yes, I’m saying the majority of their marriage has been a political show. Wedding rings in such a space are props at best. He needed a therapist, not a college aged intern aka mistress. He’s clearly attempting to making amends, which suggests to me he’s in therapy and is at a stage when he can be truly honest–at least about that. I predict a divorce or legal separation is coming.

Pray for Bill, Monica, and Hillary.

Bill Clinton: Monica Lewinsky affair was to ‘manage my anxieties’

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How to not get sick or get everybody else sick

My mother’s been on my ass about stocking up on food and water for months, and predicted this pandemic years ago.  I’m using a bit of her common sense from childhood to state the obvious in the face of a nasty virus hitting the streets.

Wash your hands before you touch your genitalia and after you touch your genitalia. Stop picking your nose, and stop ignoring when others do it. Wash your hands or wear gloves everywhere. Wash your hands as soon as you get home, get to work, where ever.  Cook your own food and avoid large crowds.  Cancel your vacation or business trip.  Stock up on food and water.  Work online and minimize your face to face work settings and public transportation.

Wash your nasty hands, fool.

‘We Were the Undeserving Throngs’

From Chronicle Review:

Being a Black Academic in America

In the wake of the scandal, The Chronicle Review asked graduate students, junior professors, and senior scholars what it’s like to be an African-American academic today.

“The first thing I learned at college was that as a black student I had ruined college for everyone else.”  Read more here.

I’ll be back in a future post to talk about my experiences from grad school in New England to mid-career at an HBCU in the midst of many micro and macro aggressions along the way.

Comment and discuss below.

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“Pathways to Equity through UDC” #UDCFirebirds #pathwayspossible #UDC1851

Go  listen and  join the conversation about UDC!

https://www.blogtalkradio.com/at-the-edge-thinkculture/2019/10/18/pathways-to-equity-in-higher-education-humanities-and-more-equalfundingudc

Pathways to Equity in Higher Education: Humanities and More #equalfundingudc

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Dr. Aparajita De and President Ronald Mason

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Chenequa Holland

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Dr. Cherie Ann Turpin, 2/2020

I support UDC Pathways to Possible!

I support UDC Pathways to Possible!
#pathwayspossible #udcfirebirds #udc1851
#fairshot https://udc.edu/pathways #pathwayspossible
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Statera Fiducia

Gravitas, Pietas, Veritas, Severitas, Virtus, Dignitas

earth space cosmos

Soundcheck: getting better and healing old injuries

 

A poem is coming.
But first, a revelation as I heal and  recover more personal power…

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Soundcheck.
Most of my adult life I allowed people to tell me what my boundaries, needs, and spaces are or should be, what or who I should allow close to me, how I should react–mostly at my expense, emotionally and otherwise.
Black women are pressured into participating in our own gaslighting for the good of the collective, and those of us who question this way of thinking are perceived as troublesome or at the least hostile.  When silence prevails, boundaries, needs, and spaces are not respected or met.
I wanted to break that cycle.   It is one of the biggest reasons why I am, once again, back into therapy.
I am speaking of when communication is not happening, when consent and respecting boundaries, needs, and spaces are not being discussed or negotiated with regard to gaining and developing emotional access and intimacy.
As Black women we have the right to negotiate our own boundaries, as well as our own needs and spaces despite living in an environment that privileges men, particularly men with race and social class privilege.
Further, consent is not just about sexual contact, and  I am not talking about sex in this brief discussion.
Consent means mutually respecting boundaries, needs, and spaces when it comes to gaining and developing emotional access and intimacy.  It is also about people speaking up and speaking in a manner that is honest and free of passive-aggressive diction.
Finally, it is also about respecting each other’s humanity through communicating.
In short, do not assume I have or have not given consent.
Ask me.  Discuss it.  Negotiate consent as a reasonable person.
Ask questions and engage in discussion.  Challenge assumptions, and engage in discussions about mutual and different boundaries, needs, and spaces.
I refuse to play into others’ assumptions about me or other human beings, so please provide that same opportunity to me and others.
Communication is key in building respect and trust, and so is practicing consent.
Hear my voice.
IMG_8722 Dr. Cherie Ann Turpin