not very subtle

you do know that I can still see you, right?

you don’t live in Norway or any of those countries with servers

you use to bounce around on to read my blog

you live right here in DC not too far from me

not very subtle, are you?

might as well just show up to my door with flowers

or chocolate covered figs

saying yeah i been stalking you

you too old for that stalker bullshit boy

grow the fuck up and eat some raw oysters

for them shrunken balls

corporate slacks must have cut off your blood flow

look me dead in the eye and tell me

what you want from me

grown black man can do that

you can take a yes or no like a grown up

I’m no child so talk to me like a grown up

bitchass slaves to white supremacy

can’t face their own feelings

let alone express them

fear of the whip of rejection runs through the eons

as does fear of the black woman who is free

all this shit was so unnecessary

but necessary for the healing we both needed

at this stage let’s work on being grown folk talking

you got mad at me

for friendzoning you

but you don’t know how to be anything to me

or with me

let alone friend

without withholding something or everything

you want me to give trust submit to air in silence

you get to take from me

my emotional energy and support

while you leave me

suspended in a gaslight cloud

why?

if I had a dick would you do that?

what is it about me that

leaves you literally staring at me

while at the same time silent and withdrawn from

the real me

the reality

the opportunity to be around the real me

beyond the bullshit

what is it about me

beyond my public persona

that angers you so much you can’t talk to me

and tell me what you want from me?