scrambled eggs and toast for you: good morning, dear one

Why are you stuck in the 19th century when it comes to women? I mean, other than the fact you come from the part of the deep south where men still drag women by the hair and still do paper bag tests for entry into certain clubs and institutions. Plus, you think chicks are supposed to ‘obey’ men, so you don’t take that consent ‘thing’ seriously.

You keep thinking you can hold on to that unhealthy dynamic of you dumping your emotional issues on other people, mainly women without a true exchange and expecting us to do it all without even lifting a finger. And then wondering why almost all your relationships with women go sour.

But why did you think you could groom me and gaslight me into being your slave/asset and what was your next move after that? And what will you do now since I broke your spell and threw it back in your face?

I’m at least willing to work with you to help you develop a different approach. But you have to want it, and you have to make the first move because you made it impossible for me to do that with your issues and poor attempts at making a spell stick on me–I keep casting all of it off me and off my house and property.

So guess what? Your spiritual house are not just exposed but cast out of my presence and not welcome before me.

You the human are welcome in my presence before me. Not your con game grooming crap. I want you the human being, not that toxic bullshit you use to control people.

The only person stopping you from getting what you really want from me is YOU.

I’m right here, enjoying my lovely, slimmer, healthier body and mind. I know my worth, and I don’t beg men or women to love me.

I’m already assumed to be disposable trash by these people you look to as your guides, so I don’t give a fuck whether I upset them or you, to be honest. You seem a bit frantic about what I think about you, now that I’m no longer allowing you to gaslight or groom me. Why not ask me?

Of course, the question remains: WHY do you really want me to continue to air out our relationship issues to the whole planet other than because your panties are in a twist about not being able to control me or gaslight me into silence after giving me the silent treatment? Do you think everyone else in our community thinks about Black women the way you do?

Really?

I reject the entirety of the Cult of True Womanhood, Cult of Southern Womanhood, Cult of Domesticity, and the Cult of Mary, which pretty much means I don’t allow men or women to put me in a box where I smile and endure like some evangelical wife who tries not to bring attention to the fact that her husband treats her like a rock to drag around. I don’t need a man to have a house to live in.

You, on the other hand, created such a narrow passage about what being you means, how you look, sound, etc., with very little room to be human or different from the ruling class.

How can you say you are just trying to human when you don’t allow me to be human as well? When positive in your eyes means my pain and my voice is not for human ears, least of all yours? That may not be your intent, but that’s how you come across with that Black Respectability bullshit that I refuse to absorb.

You need another strategic plan for approaching me or getting what you want from me right about now, don’t you?

Try a Zoom meeting or a FaceTime call.