To be a touchstone (whisper to a predator on full-blue moon Samhain 2020) [revised]

To be a touchstone (whisper to a predator on full-blue moon Samhain 2020)

[still revising so excuse the errors!]

So much I have learned about myselfabout people and patienceabout self-esteem and courageabout human weakness(what is a touchstone?)and empathy for the wounded
I stand on my principlesregardless of the consequencespresented to me becausethat is the womanmy mother and my father raised
My seizures are God’s reminder tomake my voice heard andbe the person I am who I NAME
You just happened to meet meas I was emerging from a long journeythrough anxiety while claimingfull humanity and watching you watch me
You being free ofsubservience and self-demeaningcame partially to you butyou don’t understand it from aBlack woman’s perspective.You see it but you are notempathetic to it
Do you remember when we met forlunch for the first time?
You were talking about your fatherneglected you emotionallymade you feel inadequatehow much of that you inheritedhow you carried something in youescaping release and expressionlife is not a singularity of edge
you asked for this

so be a grownup and

respond like a grownup

you are not a fucking robot and

social justice work is hard on my brain

especially when some folk

sometimes including you

mansplain or red-bone splain

themselves while using their/your privileges to

complete agendas at the expense of

the routinely ignored and oppressed

though you don’t see it that way or

you may not intend it that way as

you fulfill your own needs and as

you avoid conflict because

you are wounded and

you are feeding on others to heal

me most of all, the one who still loves you

the one telling you need help and prayer.